Open Letter to My Readers: Title Change

Open letters seem to be kind of popular these days so I thought I would write one.  I don’t know where you post these; someone always sends me links to wherever these things are printed.  Then I remembered I have this space on this blog so – voila.

I wanted to let everyone know that my title/status has changed.  In the interest of honesty, I made up a new title and I merely assumed it.  But I still thought it Open Letter worthy (mostly because I wanted to be trendy and write an Open Letter.)  Still, I encourage you to pass it on to your friends in case they want to change their titles to (and all the fabulous gossip sites with have headlines reading ‘Supermom Writes an Open Letter’ – like this one!)

If you find yourself on a website where a collection of women are sharing opinions, you have, most likely, accidentally wandered into a warzone with a fierce battle raging between Working Moms and Stay at Home Moms.  Even women who don’t have kids have violent opinions about who should be watching with these other women’s (whom they have never met) kids.  (I am not trying to be sexist, I just honestly never hear men talking about this.)

Now, I love a good blood bath as much as the next gal so the minute I see Mom4Better68 post that she is not trying to pass judgment (she is) but she cannot understand why NeedtoPayBills would allow another (certified and clearly qualified caregiver) to raise her children; I pop up some popcorn and put me feet up – this is going to get good.  While the Stay at Home Moms beat their chests about the joys of washing sheets, the Working Moms march in with their grenades of “you have clearly given up your identity and self worth for raising children (even though you gave this much thought and honestly adore staying home with your children.)”  At no time does either side recognize that at some point, we all weighed our options and made the decision that was best for our family and us.  And why would they? Taking sides and sending spitballs at the opposition is much more fun.

Well, I figured it out – it’s the title. That title is not adequately describing our choice and therefore has become a sore spot.  So, henceforth, I shall no longer be referred to as a Stay at Home Mom but as:

Retired, Raising Children.

I had a career.  I left it; no one fired me or escorted me from the building. I choose not to work and live off a set income – therefore I am retired.  I may come out of retirement but for now, I am retired. And I am raising kids (despite what the Mothers say.)

So there you are – sheathe your swords, kick off your combat boots; women can once again unite and relish in their ability to make a choice about how to raise their own children and all of the First Wavers who had their teeth kicked in to give us that choice can finally stop smacking their heads and have a beer.


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