I am almost finished with my thank you notes.  They take me forever to complete.  I would never cite generosity as a problem so I will say a factor is the sheer volume of gifts bestowed upon me during this part of the year.  Between Christmas and my birthday, I am positively flooded in loot.  No, my problem is that I simply have too much to say (no, too much to say, not that I talk too much, thank you.) I wrote five pages to J. just to thank her for the notepaper on which I was writing.

I realize I should thank the gifter and move along but it always goes awry.  For instance, I wrote Adonis a thank you that went south quickly, if you know what I mean.  No?  It means I wrote some things so filthy the mail carrier has to handle it with heatproof gloves.  I simply don’t know what got into me?  Oh wait, yes I do; it was Adonis, and he needed thanking for it.

Then I wrote Romeo to thank him for the most thoughtful birthday gift and ended up inviting him for the month of February.  Lord help me if he accepts – it would take a contortionist to rearrange my schedule.  Although, a contortionist is not a bad idea for his visit, especially if he… oh, you see where it goes wrong, don’t you?

It’s just that I start writing and it’s the perfect time to convince someone I actually do posses an actual emotion.  But then I get carried away and by the time I’m through, I have opened my soul and poured out my heart on to the paper.  Once a year is not so bad to do such a thing, I suppose.  It’s just when the recipient feels so much “closer” to me and responds in kind.  Of course I can get away with it – I am devilishly clever – but I can’t be expected to sit though their nonsense, can I?

And then I’ll get a call.  Someone who resides in my heart is on the other end of the line – their voice low, a catch in their words.   Life has dealt them a blow that I am helpless to fix and listening does not feel like enough, regardless of what they assure me.  And I remember why I write all those notes; because the love expressed in all that generosity does matter; because I am grateful for that which I have and that which has been shared with me. Taking a moment to express gratitude gives us an extra moment to be reminiscent of it – and reminds us that one day we too will place that call.

My point is, darlings, thank you for coming here, for listening to my silliness and for being in my world.

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