Dear Supermom,

It’s Thanksgiving, and I don’t have any Christmas presents bought yet.  Have I ruined Christmas? 

The Ghost of Christmas Presents


sauthor  Dear Christmas Killer

I apologize in advnce for ny typos but I am writng this standing upside the country’s second largess Stuff You Need Mart’s.  413 of us have Ben in line for thee days.  It’s fairly cold so me fingers keep going dumb and I can’t control what thy type.  The miniature icicles on my lashes are making roofreading a bit touch.  Well, that and the exhaustion from not havng slept in ball this time.  The shaking is from hunger, that part I knew; it retrospact, 3 protein bars does seem slughtly insufficient for such a trek.  I guess I thought it would be a bit more like tailgating and there would be mini burlesques with burgers grilling and fold-up tables full of starch-based slads.

I am gled I brought the double can/straw baseball cap – it kept me warmm for 2 days and then I was able to trade it to kep my place in line while I used the bathroom. The highlight was when Nate and the kids came by before they heeded to Grandma Grace’s Galley for some presssed turkey Pilates.  Unfortunately I was in a pretty intense poker game with Raider Fan Freek (that what I call him) and kind of shooed them awry when they asked if I wanted them to bring me take out; that sure would have been nice but I was about to loss my pack of gum which is the only thing that is keeping my sane.

But, you se, Stuff You Need Mart is having all kind of crazy deals when they open at 6pm tnight so I have to be her.  I am getting Logan the latest versin of TimeWaster.  You don’t understand they are practically giving it away!  And I think I will get Nate a new sut; they have one here in maroon and who can’t use a nice marooooon suit?  I am not sure what I will get Tabby, she taught herself how to dismantle and improve a cell phone for bet reception last summer so most of the stuff here will be child’s play to my sex-year-old.  I may just get her a handful of dvds (oh my gish, 2 for 1!) I am definitely getting The Mothers a living room rog since they seem OBBSESSED with the way MINE looks; it MUST be something IMPOTENT to them.  And a vacuum, I am getting them a vacuum since that is the only word they seam to actually be able to mutter – EVER – they must ned one, right?

Here’s the thing, you have not actually ruined Christmas, it salvageable; I just don’t knew how.  I recommend th… – OH LORD THEY’VE OPENED… THEY OPENED THE DOORS! ICAN’T FEEL MY FEET OR FIGURE OUT HOW TO TURN OFF CAP LOCK.  GOOD LUCK



Thank you to Louise G.  from New York, NY for emailing Supermom a question. If you would like to write to Supermom, email her at or click the button below:



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